scariously

by Benjamin

/
  • IT CAME FROM THE PLAYGROUND!!!!

    All acoustic songs, made with cleverness and kindness!

     

1.
2.
02:50
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03:11
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02:20
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02:31
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01:52
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03:11
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03:13
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00:52
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02:47
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18.

about

These songs have all been created and tested in a preschool environment. No keyboards were used in this production! May be played in the background for its soothing tones, or amped up to give your kids something to dance and chant to.

The biggest criticism leveled against this album is that kids play it too much. Should not inspire revulsion in adults until approximately the 40th straight playthrough.

credits

released 01 April 2010

tags

license

all rights reserved

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Track Name: Simple Things
Simple Things

Keep your shoes on,
Keep your pants up,
Keep your shirt down
(clap, clap, clap clap)

Keep your fingers where I can see them
And don't ask me to smell them

And if you suck a toy
I have to take it away
And if you're loud at nap
You keep your friends awake

These things are common sense
Like One, Two, Three
Like left and right, like A-B-C

Don't interrupt me when I'm talking
And look at where you're walking

Stand still in line
And wait your turn
Keep you hands off the stove
Cause they will burn

Put away what you get out
And inside don't speak so loud

Keep your bottom on your chair while you eat your food
Ask me nice for milk, cause yelling's rude

These things are common sense
Like One, Two, Three
Like left and right, like A-B-C

Like hands are not for fighting
And bottoms are for biting

Like use your words
And not your whine
Like sharing toys
What's yours is mine

Keep the potty talk in the bathroom
And do you give up too soon

Cause if you work real hard
And you concentrate
Little by little, you can do something great

Cause the greatest things
Like One, Two, Three
Like left and right, like A-B-C
They all start as small as a mustard seed
But they can grow as big as the universe you see

(alt. ending:
And if you do em well
And make em a part
Of the way you live,
Then you can start
To go on to bigger things
Like two wheel bikes
And model trains
And mountain hikes
And on and on
There's just no end
Of the things you can do
Cause you're a human!
Track Name: I Woke Up
I woke up

I woke up, had breakfast
Gave my mom a little kiss
Went outside, got on my bike
Up and down the street I ride
Up and down the street I ride

Later on I met my friends
Right about where my street ends
All together we went to the creek
Where we heard the crawdad speak
Where we heard the crawdad speak

In the sand by the water
My best friend found a treasure
He told me I should keep it
I put it in my pocket
I put it in my pocket

After that I climbed a tree
Hid myself in the blue leaves
Watched the runners on the path
Smelled how much I need a bath
Smelled how much I need a bath

In the tree I hummed a tune
About the Sun goin down and the brand-new Moon
I dozed off, I fell down
Lost the treasure my friend found
Lost the treasure my friend found
Track Name: Accident Prone
Accident Prone

When I tried to turn I ran into a cone
And that's why they call me accident prone
After that I stubbed my toe on a stone
And that's why they call me accident prone

Accident prone, accident prone
It's easy to be wheezy when you're accident prone

I fall down the stairs when I leave my home
And that's why they call me accident prone
And when I went skiing I broke a couple bones
And that's why they call me accident prone

Accident prone, accident prone
It's easy to get bloody when you're accident prone

When I was dancing I tripped over Jerome
And that's why they call me accident prone
And when I called the doctor I smashed the phone
And that's why they call me accident prone

Accident prone, accident prone
It's easy to be clumsy when you're accident prone

When I mowed the lawn I ran over the gnome
And that's why they call me accident prone
When I am around there ain't no safety zone
And that's why they call me accident prone

Accident prone, accident prone
It's easy to be silly when you're accident prone

I forgot about the toaster and burnt your scone
And that's why they call me accident prone
Just seeing my reflection makes me want to groan
And that's why they call me accident prone

Accident prone, accident prone
It's hard to boring when you're accident prone
Track Name: Up the Mountain
Up the Mountain

We went up the mountain
Looking for a fountain
Found a volcano
Cooked a potato
You asked me for a soda
I told you where to go-ah
Check the other mountain
There's gotta be a fountain

So we went up that mountain
Looking for a fountain
You found a river
Filled with gold and silver
I called up the miner
But he was at the diner
On the other mountain
Where there has to be a fountain

So we went up that mountain
Looking for a fountain
Rather found a cabin
Where the stream was babblin’
Tried to stay through Thursday
But we got to thirstaaay
So we went down the mountain
Hoping to find a fountain

We went down the mountain
Where we found a fountain
It was in the valley
Where the good ole' Sally
Drove us through the city
To the lithium spring
It was such a tasty fountain
That had traveled down the mountain
It had traveled down the mountain
It was such a tasty fountain
Track Name: Try
Try

why do you dance
hands on your pants
won't you go pee?
I know that the toys
girls and the boys
make you busy
all and though
I wont make you go
before you're sorry
I suggest that you try

on with your shoes
if you refuse
then please sit down
I know you aint fond
of keepin em on
and reasons abound
for takin them off
along with your sock
but if you're gonna runna-bout
then what you need to do is try

stop makin faces
pick up your laces
if you need to go, go
no matter how you cry
if you never try
fact is, you'll never know

I like lamb
don't like yams
not everyone's the same
some eat fire
others in China
dine on monkey brains
though you may escape
some that's on your plate
none of it's that strange
all I ask is that you try

stop makin faces
pick up your laces
if you need to go, go
no matter how you cry
if you never try
fact is, you'll never know

Off the bike you fall
crashin into walls
it's hard at first to turn
you gotta go again
balance and rhythm
are whatcha need to learn
and before you know
you'll be up & go
but to starts it's crash & burn
you need to try and try and try

stop makin faces
pick up your laces
if you need to go, go
no matter how you cry
if you never try
fact is, you'll never know

somethings are hard
other things by far
are a pain to do
but responsibility's
the key to being free
if you don't know, how can you choose?
Track Name: Farm Stand Stan
Farm Stand Stan

Farm Stand Stan, Farm Stand Stan
He went to the market to sell his jam
And when he got there he saw his stand
Was occupied by his brother Farm Stan Sam

Farm Stand Sam, Farm Stand Sam
He went to the market to sell his lamb
And when he got there he saw his stand
Was occupied by his sister Farm Stand Fran

Farm Stand Fran, Farm Stand Fran
She went to the market to sell her flan
And when she got there she saw her stand
Was occupied by her brother Farm Stand Dan

Farm Stand Dan, Farm Stand Dan
He went to the market to sell his ham
And when he got there he saw his stand
Was occupied by his sister Farm Stand Pam

Farm Stand Pam, Farm Stand Pam
She woke up early to open up the stand
And when she was done she washed her hands
And had a cup of coffee while she waited for her fam
Track Name: Wishlist
wishlist

I want some fancy fries
Chocolate milk and a prize
A pterodactyl of a medium size
And peanut butter shoes
I want a rocket pack
And another for my best friend Jack
And something for the panic attacks
But most of all I want you

I want a sweater vest
A Teddy bear and a treasure chest
Two pears and a priest to bless
My brand new yogurt pool
I want hawaian pants
Lucky dice and a game of chance
A checkered taxi to the costume dance
But most of all I want you

I want a new video game
A glockenspiel and a trebuchet
A pickled nickle in a seven layer cake
And a juggling caraboo [
I want more oranges too
String cheese and a pink canoe
A mason jar of atomic goop
But most of all I want you

[...?]

I want warm slippers please
Wool socks up to my knees
A couple tissues cause I need to sneeze
And hot soup for my fl—Aah-CHOO!
I want some caramel corn
A plastic jacket for the thunder storm
And a kiss cause I feel forlorn
Cause most of all I want you
Track Name: (I have had an) Accident
Accident

I have had an accident
Which is why I have been sent
To the bathroom with fresh clothes
Why this happens no one knows

First I take off socks and shoes
Then my pants I take off too
Followed by my underoos
Which this morning I did choose

When spiderman has hit the floor
Then I must check if there's more
In my body to come out
Aren't you glad I do not pout?

After I've pushed for some time
Then I wipe up what is mine
And I do a little dance
As I put on my fresh pants

In a plastic bag they go
Everyone of my dirty clothes
Then I really wash my hands
Just like mom and dad demand

There you go, that is my song
I sure hope I didn't get much wrong
Yes, of course the toilet's flushed
Do you think it's time for lunch?
Track Name: Boat Show
The Boat Show

The boat show, the boat show
The Steamboat Island Boat Show
You can come along and help me row
From Greater Seattle past Tacoma dome

To the boat show, the boat show
The Steamboat Island boat Show
I've been waiting oh so long you know
To break out the yacht and down the Sound float

And if you and me keel into the sea
I'm sure there'll be a rescue team
To fish us out and our clothes wring
And hang them to dry on the starboard string

Then we'll get a blanket and lay in the sun
Shining for a few minutes—or maybe just one
But I'll drink a pop and you'll smack your gum
And we'll feed a seagull half a hot dog bun

At the boat show, the boat show
The Steamboat Island boat Show
Ain't it funny how every single year it grows
Someday you know there'll have to be a million boats

And when it's night and the city glows
And we're wrapped up tight from our neck to our toes
We'll drift on a skiff where the current flows
And talk about the sights and the sounds and the boats

At the boat show, the boat show
The Steamboat Island boat Show
Can't wait until next year's big show
You can help me build a big old boat
With sails and a rudder and tinted windows
And a kitchen with an oven and a toaster and a stove
And we'll sail the thing past the mountains of the coast
To a little desert island that nobody knows
...
From the boat show, the boat show
The Steamboat Island boat Show
Ain't it funny how certain songs stick in your head
From early in the mornin til you crash into bed...
Track Name: QQ more (Crying Song)
QQ more (Crying Song)

Would you like to cry right now
I will even show you how
Make your face into a pout
And whaa, whaa, whaa

Did you not get what you want?
Yogurt 'stead of apple sauce
Now you're in a big old fuss
Oh whaa, whaa, whaa

[CHORUS:]
Sometimes when we're hurt we cry
Sometimes it feels good to whine
Just don't do this all the time
Whaa, whaa, whaa

How did you get that owie?
Did you fall and scrape your knee
Climbing up the apple tree
Oh whaa, whaa, whaa

On your bike did you fall off
Riding down the sidewalk
It's okay if you can't talk
Just whaa, whaa, whaa

[CHORUS]

When your mama left you hear
Did you scream and shed a tear?
(Just not so loud, you’re hurting my ear)
Whaa, whaa, whaa

Did you not get enough sleep?
Now you’re feeling so crabby
Well if you weren’t a kid, I’d give you caffine
So whaa, whaa, whaa

[CHORUS]

Did that movie frighten you
Now you're havin a boo-hoo-hoo
Its okay I'm kinda scared too
Oh whaa, whaa, whaa

Did you cry when you heard that song?
Believe me darlin there ain't nothin' wrong
With bawlin' out your heart just to prove it's strong
Oh whaa, whaa, whaa
Track Name: Pilly Belly
Pilly Belly

She's got a pilly belly,
A grubby cubby
A pretty smelly,
Muddy buddy
They eat red jelly
Until they're chubby
Then they go outside a run it off

And if it's Tuesday
They watch a movie
And if it’s Wednesday
They call up Lindsey
She brings them soufflé
And they get goofy
Til the neighbors go and call the cops

But whatcha don't know
In San Diego
She's got a cousin
Who sells his muffins
Out on the freeway
Where it's real smoggy
And she visits him as much as she can

And if it's too hot
Then they go swimmin
& he gets distracted
By all the women
But she don't get
Too offended
Cause sometimes a man is just a man

But what a girl wants
(be)sides being pretty
Or educated
Or even goofy
Is a best friend
To go with to sushi
And to talk about what happened that day

All of the trouble
And the drama
The discombobu-
-lated sambas
A girl gets into
Even if she don't wanna
Which is why she has so much to say!
Track Name: Sail With Me
Sail With Me

Would you like to sail with me
Together we will cross the sea
And if we find a great white shark
We'll chase him all across the dark
And if he leads us to a park
We'll ask our dog to please not bark

Would you like to sail with me
Together we will cross the sea
And if we find a manta ray
We'll ask him for the time of day
And if it's after twelve thirty
We'll invite him to a cup of tea

Would you like to sail with me
Together we will cross the sea
And if we find a blue dolphin
We'll use our ship to follow him
Wherever hot or cold he swims
From tropic to arctic ocean

Would you like to sail with me
Together we will cross the sea
And if we find a green tortoise
We'll ask him to please follow us
From brightest day to dimmest dusk
And feed him carrots if we must

Would you like to sail with me
Together we will cross the sea
And if we find a killer whale
We'll ask him to fill up our sails
With one great swipe of his black tail
And then we'll open up our mail

Would you like to sail with me
Together we will cross the sea
And if we find our way back home
We'll give our dog a juicy bone
And call our mother on the phone
And tell her where we both did roam
Track Name: Attitude
Attitude

Attitude, Attitude
It makes me nice, it makes me rude
Mostly I can't control my moods
So what am I to do about my attitude

Attitude, attitude
Can I change it like I change my shoes
Should I have a cookie or do I need a snooze
Or maybe you can make me some feel good food

Attitude, attitude
My mind's agitated and my heart feels blue
I got a case of nerves like I can't tell you
But I'll do what I can do about my attitude

[...]

Gooditude, Baditude
Optimistic, pessimistic—whatever, dude
Is your cup half empty, is you cup half filled
Well doesn't that depend upon the price of refills?
Track Name: Penguin Song
Penguin Song

Penguin went to school, to school
Penguin went to school
Elephant gave him a ride til he fell in the pool (SPLASH!)

Penguin went to the store, to the store
Penguin went to the store
Elephant gave him a ride til he ran through the door (CRASH!)

So Penguin went to the fair, to the fair
Penguin went to the fair
Elephant gave him a ride til he fell down the stairs (bing-Bang-BOng-BOOM!)

So Penguin went to jail, to jail
Penguin went to jail!
Elephant gave him a ride til he stepped on a nail (YEEOUCH!)

Penguin went to class, to class
Penguin went to class
Elephant gave him a ride til he fell on his... grass! (what?)

Penguin went to the sun, to the sun
Penguin went to the sun
Elephant gave him a ride til he burnt both his buns (oh... I get it!)

Penguin went back home, back home
Penguin went back home
Elephant woulda gave him a ride...

but he had broke all his bones!
Track Name: Baby with a Phone
Baby with a phone

Baby with a phone
She should call her mama now
But here mom's not home
Mama went to milk the cow

So baby calls her dad
Daddy asks her "How are you?"
"Dad I'm feeling sad!"
"Baby, tell me why you're blue."

Says baby to the phone:
"Daddy I miss you and mom
When will you be home?"
"Baby we will not be long."

"Okay daddy, bye."
"Bye-bye baby I love you."
"Daddy so do I."
Both hang up as they bid adieu

Baby with a phone!
Track Name: Macaroni & Cheese!
Macaroni & Cheese

Pay attention to: me
Put your arm in your sleeve
Use your elbow to sneeze
Remember thank you and please
Pay attention to me
(one, two!)
Macaroni and Cheese!!!

Every dog has a flea
Every squirrel has a tree
Every man's a monkey
And every woman's a dream
Pay attention to me
(one, two!)
Macaroni and Cheese!!!

Don't fear the bumbly bee
You know that all he can see
Is the pollen he seeks
In the flowerin' trees
Pay att to me

Don't give the baby the keys
She'll only chew them like peas
Then they'll be all sticky
And we will catch her disease
Pay attention to me
(one, two!)
Macaroni and Cheese!!!

Pay attention to me
Cause I'm feelin fussy
And the one thing I need
Is for you to give me a squeeze
Pay attention to me
(one, two!)
Macaroni and Cheese!!!